This blog is part of my recovery, and I would like it to remain a safe place for me to share parts of myself and my life that people close to me may or may not know. As a result, while I'm not going crazy with privacy settings, I do ask that if you find this on your own and suspect you may know me, please respect my privacy by checking with us before reading any further. This obviously doesn't apply if one of us has given you the link!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Sanguine Saturday On Sunday Again

Oops! I got distracted and forgot that yesterday was Saturday. I wonder if I'll ever have a normal sense of time. I suspect not, but I think I'm mainly okay with that.

I haven't made any major breakthroughs this week, I don't think, but I don't feel stuck, either. My new medication is working and I can't believe how huge a difference it is making already.

Success Stories:
Managed to eat at Sizzler in front of my brother's girlfriend again! Ate very little, but that's okay. I ate enough that I wasn't actually hungry, anyway.

I wore a dress! I don't often wear skirts or dresses because I find that I feel especially vulnerable in one... which is a real shame, because I'm girly enough to actually rather like them quite a bit.

Went to Canefields Club House with Erica! This is pretty huge, even though the instant I walked in the door I froze up and Erica had to take control of the conversation.

Tuesday I took along a few things for my session with Carol, and made my wishes clear about exploring my memories.

Midweek I had a burns review at the RBH and I used my DEAR MAN skills to prolong my next appointment until a half week after they originally said they wanted me back. I also asked about whether I'd be seeing an OT and ended up seeing one immediately after and getting a silicone sleeve to wear over the graft on my arm.

At my craft & discussion group, I was able to help others learn how to make dream catchers!

I went into Harvey World Travel to ask about fees, and when I found out how much their fees were, I walked out and tried somewhere else, all the while challenging the guilt over "wasting" their time. When I found one that had no fees (Flight Centre!), I booked my flight - paying with money I'd borrowed from my mother. I also asked my older brother if he would drop me off and pick me up at the airport, as the flight I wanted leaves before the trains start.

It's been just under 3 weeks since the last time I drank or indulged the urge to self harm. In another week I'm going to call the DBT coordinator and tell her all the good things that are going on for me these days.

Gratitudes List/Things that make me happy:
My upcoming holiday.
Mum bought me back some fruit to make fruit salad.
Getting my music collection sorted and organised a bit better.
Doing my washing. (I've missed this sort of general housework.)
Star Trek.
Good books.
My nieces and nephew.
Working medication!

Cheer-leading statements:
I am not a bad person.
I can cope with anything.
Ruminating on what might go wrong won't stop it from happening. Ruminating is rarely helpful.
If these stories aren't helpful, it doesn't matter whether they're true or false.
Change does not make the caterpillar a lie.

Take care of yourselves until next time, and may we all find our own small fences along the way.


  1. It's cool we are in the same city. Oh my gosh it's cold at the moment. Today was not too bad when you looked out the window but the day and the wind was cold. I hope you have a safe flight. I don't like flying so I admire that you can go on planes. Glad you're medication is working :-)

  2. Congrats on the accomplishments! Well done! :)
    I like the gratitude list and cheer-leading statements as well and am going to make my own.